H O M E .      A B O U T .      C O N T A C T .      T U M B L R .      T H E   B O O K   J O U R N A L .      sailorjennie [at] gmail [dot] com

Wednesday, 27 August 2014

confidence.

There was a time when all of my confidence was entwined within the strands of my hair.
A security blanket I could hide behind at a moments notice. Always long. A little frizzy. Messy.
Obscuring my flushed cheeks, too uncomfortable in my own skin to hold my head up high and say 'hey, this is me!'  
Sweeping strands behind my ears or up into a pony tail was out of the question.
What if someone noticed how square my two front teeth are? My wonky eyebrows? The scar on my chin from falling over the handlebars of my tricycle when I was four?

Those thoughts consumed me until one day my mama stood up from the dinner table and swept my hair up.
Ignoring my protests she said, those things? Baby, they're a part of you, but they don't define you.
And besides, what about those bright blue eyes of yours? They long to see everything.
They always have, from the second you were born. And I think they always will.
They want to soak in every smile, every sunrise, every tear, every star.

And in my mind there was a revelation that shone brighter than all of the constellations I had ever dreamt of.
Every imperfection. Every line. Every scar. They're mine to accept. To look at everyday.
To treasure because they're part of me. And I'm here to see them.
I'm here. To look after myself. And to think of more than just myself.

And maybe I'll never be the prettiest girl in the room. Or have perfect skin. Or straight teeth.
Maybe by eyebrows will always be wonky. A blemish on my chin an almost weekly occurrence.
They are a part of me but they don't define me.
And that's okay because I'm here.
And I know I don't have to hide behind anything anymore.

Notes.
Sometimes a silly amount of products creates the most minimal of make up looks.

Prime.
Face.
Eyes.
Cheeks.
Lips.

Never be afraid to be you. You are beautiful just the way you are.
xoxo

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67 comments:

  1. I'd give anything to write as beautifully as you. This post was so spot on. I have never felt confident with how I look, and I still don't but deep down I know the things I don't like about myself are things I can change such as weight so slowly but surely, I'm working on them. I think I give myself too much of a hard time sometimes and should just embrace who I am :)
    Jade |  Jaded Daily   

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    1. Always embrace who you are, you're wonderful <3 x

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  2. What a beautifully written post, thank you for sharing :-) Have a lovely day, Ailish

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  3. Beautiful words. I had a laugh too at the picture of the "no makeup makeup" products as mine ends up looking like that too.

    nueyork.blogspot.com

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  4. You're GORGEOUS darling <3 inside and outside!!!
    kisses
    Martina

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  5. A beautiful post and a beautiful photo of you! You write well!

    Steph | www.typewritered.com

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  6. Such a heartfelt post Jennie! Very unusually put as well!

    Divya | TheConscienceFund

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  7. You are so beautiful, Jennie. I have major issues with my confidence about the way I look. I don't know where to even begin with trying to overcome them.

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    1. I really hope that you do, you're wonderful! xxxx

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  8. That's a beautiful piece of writing there- and so true! You are beautiful! x

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  9. Beautiful Jennie. Everything about this - you, your words, the sentiment. All of it
    xxx

    Chambray & Curls /

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  10. Beautiful :)

    Mel

    http://blog.meljwills.com

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  11. So beautifully written! And you look gorgeous, as always Jennie :)

    Sam | Tiny Paint Pot xx

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  12. You have the best momma ever- go her for refusing to let you believe that! And I personally love scars. I like looking at my knees and remembering every sandbox brawl ;)

    xo marlen
    Messages on a Napkin

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  13. You are beautiful inside & out - his your head high & know that x

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  14. You are absolutely gorgeous, inside and out! Such a wonderful post :) Your mama has some great advice!

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  15. I think it could be an age thing, I think over the years I have learned to like the 'quirks of my face. It's not perfect but it isn't going to change and it's mine! I think you look beautiful, your mum is right!

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    Replies
    1. I do think that feeling comfortable is something that comes with time <3 x

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  16. Such a lovely post with the most beautiful words! Love this!

    Emily / Glittery Teacups

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  17. This might sound a little random, but you have the cutest nose! <3 xxx

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    Replies
    1. That's not the first time someone's said that to me hehe, thank you! xx

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  18. This was beautiful. I think I still have that struggle to find confidence, but I take it one step at time.

    xx
    destroyed-beauty.blogspot.com

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    Replies
    1. Absolutely, it takes time but you'll get there! xoxo

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  19. Lovely post Jennie! Despite the fact that you are actually SO pretty on the outside we all know beauty shines from within...so you are glowing with beauty! x

    Josie’s Journal

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  20. Lovely post! I used to feel the same way about myself (though I'm sure everyone did, at one point or another!). Slowly but surely, I'm accepting my flaws as who I am :)

    xx becky // star violet

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  21. I am so guilty of hiding behind my hair - or just anything I can, really, that this really resonated with me. It's sad, because we're all so quick to lift each other up (or at least, the people I choose to associate with are), but we can very rarely do the same for ourselves.
    I'm so pleased you're learning not to hide, and not to only see flaws when you look at yourself; I'm hoping to get there, too, one day soon! (And you really are very naturally pretty, for the record) xx

    francesca | on-thebias | fashion, beauty, lifestyle

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    1. You totally will get there <3 <3 xx

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  22. This is beautifully written, and I love what your mum had to say :) I laughed at the bit about the make up products, it's so true! xx

    http://bethht.blogspot.co.uk/

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  23. Beautifully written, Jennie. My hair was 100% my security blanket at school too, and it feels so much better to feel comfortable in my own skin with my hair swept back!

    Tamsin xx | A Certain Adventure

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  24. Such a succinct and inspiring post, your mum is so right!

    Clare from Tweet xx

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  25. What a beautifully put post - and your mom is awesome.

    Meghan xo

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  26. what a beautiful post! This post inspired me as a reminder for myself that it's okay to let people see my imperfections because they're a part of me. Always have been and always will be. It's okay to feel insecure about yourself because of your imperfections but the thing that we all have to remember is that those little imperfections make us who we are today.

    xoxo
    www.colorsinmybubble.blogspot.com

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  27. You write so beautifully Jennie. You're such a special person!

    Tara x

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  28. YOU are beautiful, your writing is beautiful, your pictures are beautiful and your mom is simply amazing! :)

    Keep on shining and spreading the positivity! xx

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  29. Such a lovely post, I love the way you write! Ha, love the little note at the end too, I find I always use way more products for a more natural look than I do for a night out! :) xx

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  30. I guess we all need to be reminded that we all have flaws and maybe others aren't flaws at all. It's almost surprising how similar we all are in our fears.

    You're beautiful and it seems to me you have a wonderful mind too.

    x

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